"I'm Asian, so I'll eat your cat." 2. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Well I for one am appalled. Look I clued everybody in. Rachel Crawford: Yeah do you want to be buried or cremated? Not name your state. And even then I knew it wasn't right. Every time I ask her about it, she just cries and takes another Rolaid. Laura Lee Winslow: Does shag carpet also make you crazy? [steps on the gas]. Waldo: I said he Hey, you can't trick me! Steve Urkel: [after discovering that the stereo in Eddie's car has had its serial number scratched off] Uh-uh. [sees the kids] Oh my Lord! Harriette Winslow: You eat all that ice cream and you can kiss your diet goodbye. [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the next name]. Lt. Murtaugh: Keep the pace, Mr. Backwards Hat! Steve looks at Laura], [At The Winslow home in the alternate world]. Steven Quincy Urkel: But I'm going the recommended cruising speed for this vehicle Any more could be risky. Carl = Son, you have disobeyed me for a woman? The nuptuals have developed a slight snafu. But you know what, I find her very attractive. Harriette: What for? Carl Otis Winslow: Well sweetheart, if you feel that strongly about it, maybe you should do something about it. Lt. Murtaugh: No, because I brought him back. Carl: Rachel, you're putting entirely too much filling in those. Web. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You mean, you want to kiss me? [heads for the stairs - Carl grabs him by his suspenders] I almost got ya there, Carl. It was your free safety. It was my nickname in preschool! He's half-Nerd, Half-Carl. Should I be getting some Handi-Wipes? Steve Urkel: Loving you is like trying to touch a star. Steve Urkel: 'Standardized Urkel Elementary Math Exam'. The Battle of Pickup Lines: Part 1 || STEVE HARVEY - YouTube Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [nervous laughter] Great Wedding, huh dad. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: What're you so happy about? Carl: Rachel, Carl was my great grandfather's name and there is no way that I'm gonna change it. Actor Jaleel White, famous for his cultural touchstone role as Steve Urkel in Family Matters, is entering the cannabis industry.Through a partnership with 710 Labs, White's new cannabis line . Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Cheating is wrong, Eddie, and you should know that. You're standing on my finger! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Waldo heads into the kitchen as Steve emerges] You o.k., Eddo? The lovestruck genius of Steve Urkel - CNN Video I just wish it would all go away, Daddy. You have the right to have an attorney present. Pull your gun right now. The Nineties. You know that? [the half nerd side of Carl goes into the anatomy of worms. Ms. Steuben: Steve, it's not a good sign when you have to give your bread a pep talk. Ken: You make me wanna puke! Laura Lee Winslow: Yeah, but only for one month. I'll just begin a rigorist-training schedule. Steve Urkel: I think it's because these pants are so loose! Newsflash, Eddie! Steve Urkel: Laura, this is a a really special moment and well, I think we should celebrate it by getting married. Mango? Carl: Typical. Everyone would think that Laura is in love with Steve Urkel and no one would vote for her. [He and his partner grabs Willie and Waldo]. Carl Otis Winslow: All right. Carl Otis Winslow: [fishing for the catch of a party Eddie wants to go to] Are his parents going to be there? Laura Lee Winslow: What you did for me tonight was really special. https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_102099, https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_quotes_102099. Waldo: Fifteen and that's as high as I'm going. Your father waited at the Box Office for an hour. I didn't kiss you. Eddie: I just did the laundry and I'm on my way out to wash the car and cut the grass. Carl Otis Winslow: Yes, Harriette! Laura Lee Winslow: That you'll never go into outer space again. Why, I guarantee you he has studied the best! So I walked in the library, sugar, I couldn't believe my eyes, there were THOUSANDS of books just sitting there waiting to be read. Steve Urkel: Well, actually, this is Eddie's story. Laura Lee Winslow: Did you get any sleep? [poins to the part on Harriette's diary] Aha, it's over with me and Raoul. Steve Urkel: I have a lot of personal experience in first aid. Carl Otis Winslow: I didn't bring my gun. Maxine Johnson: Ooh Laura, you look good. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: [after pulling his underpants out of his jeans] Sir, would you do me the honor of autographing my boxer shorts? And to top it all off you gave me an old card that I already have. Steve Urkel: Uh-oh, Mr.Frostbite. Laura: I was thinking about taking a home economics class so I can learn how to cook. He created a machine that could cause items to grow in size. Steve Urkel: Laura! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: [talking to Chondra in the bar about Maxine] Aww, yeah, she's a sweetheart but if she caught us in here together she'd rip off your arm and beat me with it. What do you use to get weighed, a postage scale? Why, it'll ruin my transcript! Harriette: That won't get the stains out. College Problems Student Problems That wasn't a rock video. Laura Lee Winslow: If you have to ask, pass. Jaleel White, the actor best known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom Family Matters, has launched his own cannabis brand - on the day enthusiasts around the globe enjoy a toke. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's your aunt's name, who'd want to kill her, and who do you like in the World Series? Waldo: [after thinking a moment] Ok. If you cut me, do I not cough? I wish I'd never done it. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: O.k., but I'm not Home. [Laura has stuffed her bra with Eddie's socks], Steve Urkel: [entering] Hi gang! Steve Urkel: Oh, no buts! Can you believe that? Remember last year when she bought that date with the retired underwear model. Steve Urkel: Yes! Harriette Winslow: No, you don't have to remind me of nothing. Carl enters her room with Eddie, who is struggling to stifle his laughter.]. Steve Urkel: I've never tried out for athletics before and the equipment list says that every guy should wear a cup. Steve Urkel: Laura's got the highly infectious mucus-nasal-osis-inflamicus. I may get F's, but, by God, I earn them! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Who would've thought Harriette was a bit friendly. You got the whole family off on the wrong foot. 8. Oh, you're a sore for sight eyes! Steve Urkel: You yelled at me and you called me a butthead! Well, actually it's Quincy, but you guys get the picture. Waldo: I got close once. I can assure you that we Urkels are a fine, old family, with a proud name. "Pass the salt, Edward." Laura Lee Winslow: I don't know, and quite frankly, I'm tired of thinking about it. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Dad, when are we leaving? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Yeah? He's a lawyer! You are such a sweetheart. Laura, please. Five hundred on the line. Carl: Of all the names that I have called you , the one that bothers you is butthead? What's up? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I have been scared straight, I saw a guy who had a tattoo of a battleship. Bye! I almost went to the movies with Vicky Vanderfanny. And sometimes I was sorry I ever started the whole thing, but I didn't quit. Carl Otis Winslow: Tell me Harriet, before I left for work this morning, did I or did I not tell Edward to empty the trash can? Laura Lee Winslow: [enters the room] All right, Curtis. Inside this scrawny chest, there beats a heart. Ms. Steuben: But here you are. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, stupid means good. Laura Lee Winslow: Rachel Crawfish, you got me, and I like the St. Louis Cardinals. We should put those pictures in the school paper. I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. Harriette Winslow: Harsh? I'm going to give you an 'A'. When the door opens Carl appears dessed up as Steve normally dresses with his glasses]. Me and the guys were going to have a flyer party next Saturday when you go out of town. Stefan Urkelle: [Fed up with Carl Urkel annoying him constantly] That's it, go home! It's like wanting to touch a star- you know you'll never reach it but you've just gotta keep trying. The black kids won't talk to the white kids, people are calling each other names, taking sides! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: That's big talk coming from a guy in Italy. Ms. Steuben: Yeah, well Steven, you're not taking Home Ec. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well why don't you take the guy's next door? Remember you wished that Steve could find out what's it like to be you. . Steve Urkel: Carl, I brought the notes to go over with Laura. Steve Urkel: I don't have to take this! Carl: I am not. Could you write that A down on a piece of paper? Harriette: Yep, they were yelling at each other and bumping bellies. Ty: No, he's Eddie's brother. Robber: [threatens Steve] You! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Where are we going, Willie? I'm in big trouble! Harriette Winslow: Carl, you snuck into my card box and gave me a card that I already have. Cool. The lovestruck genius of Steve Urkel. Dr. Goodrich: Ms. Crawford, I am a medical doctor, not a carnival act! Steve Urkel: Hi Laura, my little sweet potata! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Oh, no buts! He introduced himself and I was immediately struck by deep brown eyes, his engaging sense of humor and how delicately he handled my cantalopes. Steve Urkel: Actually, it was my dad who said that. Grab a blanket and go sleep in the bathtub. Rachel Crawford: Can you make him quack like a duck every time the phone rings? Your dad's runnin' late. [Grabs and kisses her. Harriette Winslow: Every time she stops, she starts all over again. Lt.Murtaugh: Do you know that woman Winslow? Steve Urkel : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive Harriette Winslow: What's the matter, not feeling well? I'm being born! Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: I demand satisfaction. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [to Laura] Sugar, I realize you're having a hard time, but you've got to stand up for whatever you believe in, or things will never change. Whoo! There's no justification for this behavior! Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. Steve Urkel: Your Honor, I would like to call Waldo Faldo! Steve Urkel: All right, Laura, we'll randeavou at the Isetta. Refresh my memory. I just spend two hours talking a guy off a ledge, then found out he was a window washer. Steve Urkel: From my stay-away fund. Would you care to heal them with a kiss? My, what strong arms. Harriette Winslow: Now here's something I didn't know. 36 Steve Urkel ideas | steve urkel, humor, funny Steve Urkel 36 Pins 11y N Collection by Nadia Hussein Similar ideas popular now Humor Funny Funny Quotes Chemistry Humor Nerd Humor Funny Charts When You Cant Sleep Lol Bahaha Clean Humor I Love To Laugh True Stories How To Fall Asleep Funny Jokes All the TIME!!!! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: March 24th, Raoul's houseoat is beautiful. He heads downstairs to confront Steve]. And you taught Cassie Lynn Nubbles, the posterchild for useless people, how to do things for herself. We'll go camping together some other time. Boyd broke my glasses. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well, what are you waiting for? I got fifty bucks on the Knicks. Steve Urkel: My "play-ground pass"? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well, so is Urkelbot! I'm on duty? Eddo. Steve Urkel: No, but it was moving kinda fast. [Eddie has just realized his mistake in standing his father for the chance to go out on his date with a girl that he likes]. Why are you guys dressed like that? Laura: But but, where'd you get that radioactive stuff? no. Does that about cover it? Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Why are ya gonna do that, Willie? Muskrat Time! 1. Then, I drove you here in *my* car, and were you pleasant company? Laura Lee Winslow: Oh lord, you're gonna die. Rachel Crawford: Right. Laura: [as Steve and Laura walk in, the guests gasp again] Steve, everyone gasped. The hot chocolate will be ready soon. Steve Urkel: [Steve is still wasted] Ooh the Durkel! I don't *ever* want to work for you again. I just wanted to make things better but I ended up making them worse! Steve Urkel: Oh, I'd better lock it then! Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Failure to signal. Steve Urkel: Well, I didn't have one. In fact, they finally introduced me to my grandparents. [after Carl as defeated Turbo with ease, Harriette runs up to him with her purse]. Cassie Lynn: Becky Sue! Steve Urkel: Calm down? Judy Winslow: Um so Grandma are you gonna be a June bride? Eddie has lied . Harriette: Don't even think like that. These kids are gonna ruin everything, they have to go. Carl Otis Winslow: What did she have to say? You know you'll never reach it, but you have to keep trying. Harriette Winslow: But, apparently, you seem to want to learn these things the hard way, so be it. Carl Otis Winslow: I recognized him right away. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: This diary belongs to Harriette and I will not violate her privacy. Steve Urkel: Swell, Punch! [Harriette laughs as Laura leaves the living room to help Mother Winslow get ready]. All the doo da day. Robber: Oh yeah? Carl Otis Winslow: Better, I locked him up. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Yeah, well you have to get rid of them. Steve Urkel: Well, isn't that just a FIIIINE kettle of fish? This isn't my grandmother. Stefan Urquelle: You can take a bus or an airplane. Harriette Winslow, Carl Otis Winslow, Laura Lee Winslow, Rachel Crawford, Estelle 'Mother' Winslow, Judy Winslow, Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [in the rap video] We are a family, we share all we got and that's easy to see, cuz we are a family! Laura: I couldn't have done this without you. It can't explode or anything? Chain: It occurs to me that you could be wired. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Urkel pronouns are the best. You think it's cool to come to a prty with a mini bar in your coat. [Eddie agrees as Mother Winslow and Harriette walks out of the living room]. I can't afford a B on my permanent record. Heapingly, overflowingly, full! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: You paid him off. Steve Urkel: I can't! Steve Urkel: Hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, oh look, it's Laura! Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. Laura Lee Winslow: [as Laura Wigglesworth, pointing a gun at Johnny] The narration to finish! Not when it's swirling around a porcelain tank. Can you imagine that? Steve Urkel: I've taken a vow of chastity. Steve Urkel - Wikipedia Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Tries to hold Eddie from pounding their friends] Eddo. Steve Urkel: What? Steve Urkel: Did I mention my dad knows Wayne Newton? Harriette Winslow: [feigns being touched] Oh, Carl this is beautiful. [goes to the refrigerator] No root beer? The people that did this to us are teaching the same GARBAGE to their kids. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Good answer! Would you like that? You know, Harriette, It's the thought that counts. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'll miss Waldo. Steve Urkel: [about the music video] This is going to be the biggest bomb since Howard the Duck. [Faces Eddie] Look at him, charming, handsome, popular. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Well it wasn't funny. You're wrong, the maitre'd gave me a two for one coupon. Then we par-tay, see no problem. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Serious. Harriette Winslow: She says OGD's a great kid, but he hasn't had it easy in his life. 2023. No Traffic. Ouchith! People just love juicy gossip! Carl's first word was Donut. Rodney Beckett: Steve, come on outside. Laura: Curtis, I got my hair done, my nails. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Yeah, I went to sleep and Stevil made a guest appearance. SUBSCRIBE to get the latest. [Steve thinks Rachel is in love with him, but she is really in love with another man named Steve]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [last lines of the series] Do I get a welcome home kiss? Steve Urkel: [panicked] um perhaps you mean "biosphere"?